Fall. The season I wait for all year long. The cooler weather, the warm colors, the delicious spices and comforting smells – I love it all.
Usually I run into fall with arms open wide and a long list of exciting activities in mind as I imagine all of the memories to be made with my children. This year, fall looks a lot different than I imagined it would. I would be entering my third trimester soon and preparing for a baby girl to join our family. Instead, I’m learning to live a different story without her.
So now as we close the hardest summer of my life, I walk into fall with mixed feelings: grief for the daughter I miss everyday, and hope for the memories to be made with my sons.
My fall plans look a little bit different than the ones I’ve made in the past. While I do intend to pack everyone up for our annual trips to the apple orchard and pumpkin patch – and while I do believe we’ll make and can the apple butter that we’ve made for five years in a row – I think this fall will be slower, more intentional, and hopefully even more treasured than any before. Because through the pain, there is beauty. It can be hard to find, but it’s there.
Psalm 16:11 You make known to me the path of life; in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore.
2023 Fall Bucket List
- Curl up with my kids and read lots of cozy fall books – All of my kids are in a phase where they’ll let me read to them for extended periods of time. I love every second of it and fully plan to capitalize on it this season. I hope to get them some new books and visit our library to borrow some, too. This blog post has some great ideas for fall picture books.
- Bake a fall spice cake – The first year we were married, I made my husband a spice cake, and he’s been talking about it ever since. Somehow, life has been so busy that I’ve not made the time to make it again. But this year I want to block out a day and do this just for him. It helps that the whole family can enjoy it, too.
- Take my kids to their first college football game – My husband and I graduated from Mississippi State University and attended every home football game while we were students. We’ve only gotten to go back to one since we left Starkville, but this is the year we’ll return. Our boys love football and have wanted to see a game in-person for awhile now, so we got tickets to the homecoming game and can’t wait to visit our alma mater.
- Embrace my role as soccer mom – This is the first year I’ll have two kids playing soccer! My older son has played for several seasons, but my three-year old will be starting this year, too. Our Saturdays will be spent on the soccer fields, and I look forward to enjoying every bit of it.
- Watch a sunrise with my husband – You know those core memories that seem small but you know you’ll never forget? I have one of those from when I was pregnant with my firstborn. I was teaching at the time, and every morning on my way to work I would pass this beautiful, misty field while the sun rose. It was stunning, and one morning I burst into tears because I just wanted to stop and watch but couldn’t because I had to get to my classroom. I told my husband about it, and he so graciously planned a Saturday morning to wake up early with me and go sit in the field while the sun rose. While we likely won’t gather all the kids into the car and drive to a random field to watch the sunrise, I want to wake up early with him and at least watch from our front yard. It’s those little moments that end up meaning more than you realize at the time, and I want to embrace them more.
So there you have it. My perhaps unconventional fall bucket list. I don’t know that we’ll have the energy or capability to “do it all” in this season. But that’s ok. We don’t have to. Memories are made even in the most ordinary of moments, in the most mundane of days.
Mallory Bell Photography is a Huntsville, Alabama family, maternity, and newborn photographer creating timeless imagery to document every stage of motherhood and family, from bump to baby and beyond. I capture your family honestly and candidly so you’ll always remember exactly how the little details felt. In the rush of life, it’s easy to overlook the ordinary moments. I aim to document the love between you and your little ones in a joyful, heartfelt way so your legacy will live on for generations to come.
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